I thought I healed, so why does my body still feel like a train wreck?

There’s something that’s been showing up more and more lately, over the last year, in my life, in my work, in random conversations, and content I didn’t go looking for.

The nervous system.

Not just as a technical term, or a buzzword slapped on Instagram. But something people are actually starting to pay attention to. Nervous system and manifestation. Nervous system and money. Nervous system and health.

And I find that interesting… because for a long time, I felt like I was talking about this in a way that wasn’t being talked about much. Not that it was mine or anything new, just that it wasn’t being saturated. It wasn’t trendy.

But that’s the thing, right? Once something gets into your field [really gets in there], it starts showing up everywhere. 😳 That’s not a coincidence. That’s not some glitch in the matrix. That’s you. That’s your focus, your perception, your attention creating patterns.

And right now, for me, that pattern is bringing me deeper into my own body.

Let me say this: I’ve done a lotttttttt of things for healing.

I’ve faced trauma. I’ve sat with darkness. I’ve screamed. I’ve cried deep womb cries. I’ve felt grief in ways I didn’t think my body could hold. I’ve released things that were buried deep, and I’ve reached the point where I could say, honestly, "This doesn’t consume me anymore."

But here's the thing, and maybe you’ve been there too:
Even after all that healing, my body still didn’t feel right.

It’s like I’d reached emotional peace in some areas. I’d processed the stories, I’d talked about the pain, I’d gotten to a place where it didn’t own me anymore…
…but I still wasn’t well. I wasn’t vibrant. My energy & sleep were wrecked. I felt hollow most days in terms of my physical self.

And that’s when I had to admit maybe this isn’t about what I feel anymore.
Maybe it’s about how my body learned to hold all of it.

Nervous system regulation isn’t just a healing trend. It’s how you exist.

We all talk about embodiment, but are we actually safe inside ourselves?

For me, that answer was a big fat no.

I’ve spent most of my life in high-strung mode. Grew up around yelling, chaos, unpredictability, and was told it was normal. So somewhere along the way, my system decided that being on edge was just... normal.

Even as I healed my mind, my body was still living like the next explosion was coming. Especially after having my kids, whew…. had those cute but psycho moments (it’s a song btw 😉)

And that over time wrecks you.

So a few weeks ago, I went back to something I hadn’t touched in years: Chinese medicine.

Why? Because it helped me before, and honestly, I was tired of chasing new answers.

A good friend here in Puerto Rico had mentioned some herbs from her acupuncturist, and it stirred something in me. Years ago, after I’d done deep trauma healing around sexual abuse, I used Chinese herbs as part of the process to help me get pregnant with my son. And they worked.

But I never went back until now.

This time around, it wasn’t about trying to get pregnant. It wasn’t about trying to “fix” something specific; it was about regulation. About calming a system that didn’t know how to be still anymore.

And listen, I’m not here to say these herbs were a miracle. I’m not selling anything. But I can say this:

Within a few days, my body started to soften.
Not in a big, dramatic way. Just... less tension.
Less reactivity. More breathing room.

And my kids? Without me saying a word, they started showing up differently, too.

Because here’s the thing, we don’t always want to admit:
Our kids feel us before they understand our words.
They match our nervous systems. And when mine is shot, theirs are too.

So here’s where I’m at this week:

I’m not saying Chinese medicine is “the answer.”
I’m not saying somatic work, breathwork, or nervous system tools will magically fix you.
I’m saying that healing isn’t one-size-fits-all.

Sometimes you need therapy.
Sometimes you need herbs.
Sometimes you need to sit in the car and cry before walking into the house.

The point is we have to stop expecting one path to do everything.
And we have to stop treating regulation like something we achieve once and never touch again.

For me, this moment is about re-learning calm. Not because my life is perfect. But because my body is finally safe enough to stop fighting everything all the time.

And that took more than a mindset. It took support, discipline, and showing up even when I felt like shutting down.

If you’re in that place too, where your emotions feel okay but your body still feels like a trainwreck, I want you to know you’re not crazy.

You're just still carrying things your brain already let go of, but your body didn’t.

And that’s where the work lives now.

Not in pushing or bulldozing through it.
But in finding the things that bring you back into balance.
Even if they’re small. Even if they take time. Even if it’s not sexy.

Because calm isn’t passive, it’s powerful.

And sometimes the strongest thing we can do is stop trying to power through and finally learn how to feel safe, steady, and fully human inside our own skin.

—Danielle

P.S.
Next week, I’ll be sharing details about my live workshop on July 30th called,
"When It’s All Too Much." If you’re holding too much and don’t know what to do with it anymore, this will be for you. Watch your inbox.