Maybe I’ve done everything. And I still felt lost.

TL;DR:
This week reminded me why I’m building Remeria: for the people who’ve done everything right… and still feel like they’re falling apart in the middle of it all.

Last week’s email was fine. Just flat.
Because honestly? The week was flat too.

I spent most of it inside donor software, accounting tools, and project boards.
All necessary. All boring.
It was just… maintenance mode. No deep emotion.. no big shift.

But then Thursday night, a few hours after I hit send on that week’s newsletter, life reminded me what I’m really doing here.

We were sitting on the terrace.
My husband was playing Wrecked by Imagine Dragons.
When the song ended, I looked over and I saw it, tears streaming down his face.

No booger tears or anything, just one of those real, human moments.

Right now, he feels broken.
A lot of life hasn’t gone the way his rose-colored glasses once hoped.
He’s lost so many Marines he served with to suicide.
Year after year, it keeps happening.
And even though I see all that he’s become… he still feels like he’s failed.

I’ll never save him.
Or anyone, really.
I can’t make someone feel peace.
But I can try.
And I will keep trying until the end of my life.

He has me built into his life; many others do not.

That’s what Remeria is.

It’s not just a nonprofit.
It’s the place I wish already existed.
For the ones who’ve done all the work, the therapy, the meds, the plant medicine, the books, the breathwork, and still feel like something’s missing.

It’s for the ones who feel like they should be “okay” by now.
But still feel stuck.
Still feel numb.
Still feel like it’s all too much.

And I get it.
I’ve lived it.
I’ve been nothing... invisible…. below average… mocked.
I didn’t grow up sounding “smart.” I spell like shit, my grammar sucks (thanks Grammarly, for helping though 🫶🏼). I often say words wrong because of how I was raised and how my brain works. Or my accent is just a pile of words that make no sense.

And for a long time, that made me want to hide.

But now?

I have a big fuck that to the fake ass box of perfection.

If you’re still caught up because I misspelled “potatoes,” go live your nitpicky life.
I’ll be over here serving the depth of humanity. ✌🏼

Because it’s not grammar that’s killing people.
It’s the shame.
The loneliness.
The societal programming that says if life isn’t that bad, you should be fine.
That mindset is what buries people.

If you’ve never struggled with depression or thoughts you don’t want to admit out loud, cool.
But you’re not who I’m building this for.
You’re not who I’m fighting for.

I’m building Remeria for the ones in the middle.
Not lost enough to be hospitalized, but sometimes end up there because there's NO PLACE to go.
Not “well” enough to be thriving.
The in-between. The forgotten. The ones who’ve done everything “right” and still feel like they’re falling apart.

That’s the space we’re holding.
That’s the mission.

And if you’re here, still reading.
Maybe you’re part of it too.

Thanks for being here with me.

—Danielle